Maybe I should read more.....

I was thinking I should read more than I do. I use to read a lot actually, but latetly it seems I want to do everything else but that. Like right now, I am writing this journal and not reading an damn book. I think there neds to be more hours in a day...than just maybe i can put my head in an good book.

There is so many things that need to be done....I should really not wait until the last minute to do them. How do people learn to be so involved with life? I feel soicity trys to tell us that we are required to have a certain level of a soical like and you should partisate in an certain activetiy based on our soicial staus. Fucked up right? I oncehad this thought that maybe I should drink more wine because that is what normal people did, right? Went home and had an glass of wine after dinner? lol fuck that.... Maybe I am considered to be lower class, but I know how to act like an civialized person and not some robot drone that is controlled by what Socitiy says....

How the hell did this journal turn from wanting to read more to what soicity says??? wtf

Good night....

Plans for life.....

What do I want from life? The truth is that I do not know myself. I have many ideas of what maybe I should expect out of life, but in reality they are not what I truely want out of life. I have certian expetations I believe everyone does at one point. Currently, I have plans of going to India by the end of this year. I really am start to realize I can not live moment from moment with out having any sort of plan. I am going to go back to college and finish up some classes. I wont be graduating until 2018 or 2019 but at least I will have my BAS in computer science with an minor in Anthropology. My big dream is to be an Cultural anthropologist. This will let me do what I truely want. I want to travel the world and meet new people!!! Anyways, when I come back from india I am going to work hard towards school and getting my live straight. I need to work getting out of debet and getting somewhere where I can be comfortable. This is my plans for my future.

any suggestions?

Dream journal

I had a person recommend me start a dream journal. Now my dreams are like mixed things that don't make any sense. I try my best but I can't even question anything. I had a few dreams that stood out but now it doesn't make any sense to me. Maybe the idea trying to remember everything is what the biggest problem, who knows.

I really wanna keep up with my blog but my ideas suck. I do not know where to start and were to end. Who knows!!! Anyways..

Sales can be tough!

Today was my first day at selling tracfones at walmart. At the moment it is an bit frustrating because I am still getting use to the infomation about the plans. I am not an slow learner but it is a lot of info to retain all at once. I am going to need soem cheatsheets soon. Maybe I will have them on my tablet for safe keeping. Wish me luck with my job and my sales.

The way things use to be

I have always enjoyed watching older era shows. I found myself draw back to the times of the kings and queens. I dont know if its just because the drama the nobles have to deal with. I never found the reading of history facts to be entertiaining, but behind the seens to be very realitable. I have even considered possible having an past connection. I would see my self of more in the asia area because I have an close bond with India. I do not feel I was noble type but more such as a simple peasent. I dont desire to be an queen because I know how they would have been taken and looked at. I  sometimes feel that maybe its just fairy tale aspect of things, but I feel i know what it was really like. I feel anger towards the way some of the people were treated. Anyways! Just thought I would share my idea behind my craving of these reads.

Haven't been the same!

Life has not been the same since I have broken up with the love of my life! It is been two years and I'm still not able to get over him. I don't know what it is but I have no desire to be with anybody else even if, I attempt to be with somebody else. All my friends tell me I need to move on and I need to find something that will at least make me happy. Point is he was the one that made me happy. Every moment that I cherish for the rest of my life are the moments that I spent with him and only him. Will I ever get over the fact that we're not together anymore? I wonder sometimes if there is something greater then I'm supposed to be doing. Maybe God wants him to focus on his life, in for me to focus on mine. Maybe with Bro at that place in our lives that we cannot be together and if we were together it would make things look for both of us really bad.

Drug of choice!!!

For the people that aren't aware! I play world of warcraft.... It is truly my drug of choice! 

I usually get to the point where I wanna play it because the urge becomes too strong. I find myself watching youtube videos of trolling videos, songs based around the game, or even people talking about how wow is dying. I am usually able to fight of the urge because I know I will become quickly bored with it. Well, it came to the point in my life at moment. I am able to have some time to play wow, focus and deal with the task in hand. Which in return will not cause me to neglect anything. You know you get in "grid" mode and don't know how to quit. lol Staying up late farming, or trying to gear up!!! lol so many things to entertain an ADHD person. 

Today, I made a choice to go back..... I go to blizzard and do 1 month subscription. Then I see a new expansion!!! It seems that blizzard comes out with a new expansion around the time I decided to go back. I was super hype about the last expansion, this one!!! NOT so much! lol I am like ... yeah ok what ever lol 

Currently downloading the game! It is gonna take a while... so I am probably gonna take a nap! 

For all your wow players out there! If you are interested in adding me and joining me. Please add: Nightlola#1383