31 - When is it too late?

Is 31 too old to get my Bachelors degree? I consider this a lot in my age. I know 31 is still considered to be a baby in some's eyes. I, on the other hand, feel like the clock is ticking down to zero real fast. I try my best not to compare myself to others in my family.

Most of my cousins have already graduated with their master's degree and are getting jobs. They are even getting houses, having babies etc.. I, on the other hand, is still living with my mom. I have moved out a few times, but never could securely be independent. It is not that I don't want too, it just that it seems it made more sense economically.  I attempted to get my bachelor's going through an online program so I can work while I study. Doing it online was taking too long because with working 40 hours, I could only take one class at a time. 

My parents want me to just work and not earn a degree. They want me to be independent and move out of their house. Trust me! I do not want to live with my parents. I truly hate it here, but I know in the long run I will be better off. It is a lunch off the pad for the bigger goal. 

This what brought me to the big question, " Is 31 too old to attempt a career?". Should I leave it alone and just go after promotions within a good company. There has been plenty of people that were very successful that never had a college education. It is not required right!? But it does for what I want to do. I guess in the long run it is never too late to start and it doesn't matter how long it takes. It just matters if my heart is in it, right?

The latest drama on paltalk....

In this blog, I am going to discuss what has been going on with Paltalk. Particularly in the spiritual section! There is always a great divide within all sections of Paltalk. There is not one section that doesn't have their rebels that enjoy coming in the chat rooms and causing issues. Now, there is this group within the spiritual section that are always trying to push people in front of trains. They claim they are calling people on their bullshit etc. Now, what part of this becomes bullying? what part of it becomes unacceptable? Do they just ignore the issue until it goes away!? Who knows.... it seems if people try to meditate the situation between the two, you become the subject of great division.

Me personally! I do not give a shit either way. Once it is directed at me, that is when it comes to an problem. I have no issues with anyone in the section and would like to keep it that way.

I have a way of making people that are considered trouble makers be okay with me. It is kinda like I bring the good out in the person because they know that they don't have to be that way with me. Even though sometimes I am a bit of a troll myself at times. When I get bored of Paltalk, I usually cause a bit of trouble. Nothing major just likes to joke around and act like some crazy white girl that doesn't have her head skewed on tight. I also sometimes take a very controversial topic and will play devil's advocate. I will start debates and discussions based on the other's opinions that are mostly disapproved of. Then other times, I will just act like a redneck that doesn't know anything. It gives me something to do at times.

Paltalk can be very draining at times and you have a tendency to lose yourself. I have met a  lot of great people on the program and hope to keep in touch with them beyond it.  I have my times and I think all Paltalk users come to a point where they spend less time on it and then go to something else. Then usually come back again. It is the time and season for everything.

Dream journal

I had a person recommend me start a dream journal. Now my dreams are like mixed things that don't make any sense. I try my best but I can't even question anything. I had a few dreams that stood out but now it doesn't make any sense to me. Maybe the idea trying to remember everything is what the biggest problem, who knows.

I really wanna keep up with my blog but my ideas suck. I do not know where to start and were to end. Who knows!!! Anyways..

Drug of choice!!!

For the people that aren't aware! I play world of warcraft.... It is truly my drug of choice! 

I usually get to the point where I wanna play it because the urge becomes too strong. I find myself watching youtube videos of trolling videos, songs based around the game, or even people talking about how wow is dying. I am usually able to fight of the urge because I know I will become quickly bored with it. Well, it came to the point in my life at moment. I am able to have some time to play wow, focus and deal with the task in hand. Which in return will not cause me to neglect anything. You know you get in "grid" mode and don't know how to quit. lol Staying up late farming, or trying to gear up!!! lol so many things to entertain an ADHD person. 

Today, I made a choice to go back..... I go to blizzard and do 1 month subscription. Then I see a new expansion!!! It seems that blizzard comes out with a new expansion around the time I decided to go back. I was super hype about the last expansion, this one!!! NOT so much! lol I am like ... yeah ok what ever lol 

Currently downloading the game! It is gonna take a while... so I am probably gonna take a nap! 

For all your wow players out there! If you are interested in adding me and joining me. Please add: Nightlola#1383 

Amazement of Nature

Lately I have been catching myself staring off in the distance, thinking of nothing in particular. Star gazed, amazed by the most simplest gleam that happens to catch my eye at that moment.Usually I since something form the corn in my eye, which makes me smile. Why all the sudden do I seem to take a step back from reality and see things in a complete different light? Is it just my imagination wondering off, to weird and fascinating places, where things seem simpler then they appear? Who knows, would we ever really know? I doubt it!

Yesterday, or lets say last night; around 3:30AM I stepped outside to smoke. As I usually do I look at all the bugs that congregate around the night lamp outside the door. I always discover a weird looking bug that I never have laid my eyes on before. Coming up with weird ideas why that it might have the patters of colors, or if its a different type of spider. Even though, I am afraid of spiders I try my best not to kill them if they are not running across my floor. I feel horrible when I kill a living creature. I tell myself; they are scared and helpless, what right do I have to take their life away? As I stood their just looking at the bugs, smoking my cigarette. I had this over whelming since of oneness with everything. As I stared off in the darkness of the night, my skin tingled and I felt as if everything around me was alive. I stared at the tree leaves and trunk as the light reflected off it; giving me a since or amazement. Knowing its living, breathing, and it had a purpose just as I do. These small moments with in my life, give me the reinsurance that there is definitely something much more to this universe then we know. If everyone actually took the time and patience to listen to the bugs chirping, silence sing, and the wind blow. We will feel the oneness that we are suppose to feel.

Why do I not have these great moments of awareness at all times? Is it because I sense things differently depending of my environment? Who knows... I wish to walk around with this awareness of how everything is intertwined with each other. We were never really meant to wonder around this planet destroying everything that we touch. Just because we are human doesn't give us a right over everything else. Why do we do this??? WHY? Only if you people understood the great pain the stamps its self on my heart, every time I come to realize the brutality of what we are capable of.

The other day, a king snake was crossing the road. I know that it might have been an accident, which in most cases people do not pay attention to where they are going. The snake was already dying, but I stopped my car, frozen on what to do. I drove around it! I knew I could not help it, and I wish I would have gotten there before it was killed, maybe then it would have had a chance. People say, " why was it crossing the road in the first place, what a stupid snake." I wanna scream, " The snake has every right to cross this road, this road wasn't here when nature made the snake, you made the road, RESPECT nature!" Nature never attended for the Human aspect (Not caring), we need to start listening and understand that they are not in our WAY, we are in their WAY. They have more of a right to be here then we do. We are a plague to this planet and I will be waiting for something to come along and treat us like we treat everything on this earth.

Have you ever really consider what I was saying? Do you ever care? Maybe if you took the time and looked and watched how in one simple life form you could understand the universe.
 
I just wish; that I could stay connected, I wish I could make people understand how I feel, and I wish there were more people that would stand up and actually do something about it.

I will shut up now...
Danielle